IN THE PRIME OF HIS LIFE
The Dads are watching their children at Bradbury pools. The kids are doing their swimming lessons on a Tuesday afternoon. A three-year-old boy is screaming in protest, others are clumsily freestyling down the heated-indoor pool while their dads sporting business shirts or hi-vis gear yell directions at them from their place on the aluminium seats. All these guys are at the height of their working life, most of them have young families and all of them are part of the highest age-demographic for suicide in Australia.
In 2016 suicide accounted for 33% of deaths in men aged 30-34 and 17% in those aged 40-45. Noted here is the fact that more women than men actually attempt to take their own lives, which is due to decreased access to more lethal methods, reducing the success of females, and increasing that of men's. This is known as the gender paradox.
Current research into male suicide suggests that society's projection of ideals concerning traditional masculinity may be a factor resulting in suicide ideation when combined with other risk factors. Dr Daniel Coleman noted in the Archives of Suicide Research that, “Depression, of course is a central risk factor for suicidal behaviour.” Other risk factors have been hypothesised such as, parental violence resulting in low self-worth, sexual assault, financial stress, substance abuse or any number of other factors. But, even the theorists admit they are no closer to understanding why in some of the wealthiest nations in the world men are ending their lives in their prime.
On the ground speaking to several men in the 30-45-year-old demographic, the reasons for their suicide ideation have a lot more commonality and clarity. Relationship breakdowns, abuse, divorce resulting in financial loss and custody battles became a story of pain and repetition. They are all still raw, angry, hopeless and medicated.
These experiences may be in direct correlation to the academics with their theories of gender roles and traditional masculinity. But to the men in the stories below it was simple; they had just lost their family, and they wanted to escape the pain.
James’ story
James was in the army reserves training to be an officer. He had just finished his training to be a radiologist and was working at Westmead Hospital in Sydney. He was introverted and twenty-five-years old, it was about time to find a girlfriend.
She ended up being the girl of his dreams, in his own words he was “besotted.” He married her and they started their family. But all wasn’t well.
